Yes, it's friday again, so here's another joke to end the week! Have a great weekend!!
Five surgeons are discussing who are the best patients to operate on.
The first surgeon says, 'I like to see Accountants on my operating table because when you open them up, everything inside is numbered.'
The second responds, 'Yeah, but you should try Electricians! Everything inside them is colour-coded.'
The third surgeon says, 'No, I really think Librarians are the best;everything inside them is in alphabetical order.'
The fourth surgeon chimes in, 'You know I like Construction Workers. Those guys always understand when you have a few parts left over at the end, and when the job takes longer than you said it would.'
But the fifth surgeon shut them all up when he observed, 'You're all wrong. Politicians are the easiest to operate on. There's no guts, no heart, no balls, no brains, and no spine, and there are only two moving parts - the mouth and the asshole - and they are interchangeable!
Friday, July 31, 2009
Thursday, July 30, 2009
New Toy
Hubby got his new toy last week.
He is not one that indulges in toys, but after observing his friends and fellow colleagues have so much "fun" with theirs, he decided to get his own. We are talking about the new iphone 3GS.
The family had a great time "exploring" his new toy. We have now downloaded games which unfortunately no one can play with unless its the weekend. You see, hubby relies a lot on that phone of his for work. And if everyone were to be playing games on it, the battery would only run out too quickly, and when he really needs it for work (which is 24/5 - 24 hours from Mon to Fri), he may be caught short. So we only get to play with it on weekends.
Smitten by it, but unfortuantely, I am not able to change to the iphone, coz it is only offered by one mobile company in Singapore, and I am not with that carrier. To buy it without a plan would just be too expensive!! So what can I do?
I am just making do with my current phone, which suits me fine. But guess what, I am getting the "brother" of the iphone - the itouch!!
It has all the capabilities of the iphone - except for the calling and messaging. So I can still have my games etc, and the kids will be able to play with it without worrying about interrupting Papa's work! So I have a new toy too!!
:D
He is not one that indulges in toys, but after observing his friends and fellow colleagues have so much "fun" with theirs, he decided to get his own. We are talking about the new iphone 3GS.
The family had a great time "exploring" his new toy. We have now downloaded games which unfortunately no one can play with unless its the weekend. You see, hubby relies a lot on that phone of his for work. And if everyone were to be playing games on it, the battery would only run out too quickly, and when he really needs it for work (which is 24/5 - 24 hours from Mon to Fri), he may be caught short. So we only get to play with it on weekends.
Smitten by it, but unfortuantely, I am not able to change to the iphone, coz it is only offered by one mobile company in Singapore, and I am not with that carrier. To buy it without a plan would just be too expensive!! So what can I do?
I am just making do with my current phone, which suits me fine. But guess what, I am getting the "brother" of the iphone - the itouch!!
It has all the capabilities of the iphone - except for the calling and messaging. So I can still have my games etc, and the kids will be able to play with it without worrying about interrupting Papa's work! So I have a new toy too!!
:D
Tuesday, July 28, 2009
Cholesterol Heaven
Today, I made it to cholesterol heaven.
I had the famous Hill Street Char Kway Teow, and the sinful roxy Laksa.
And I had it both for lunch.
YUM!
(Payback time will come later when I have to walk twice as long to work it off.)
I had the famous Hill Street Char Kway Teow, and the sinful roxy Laksa.
And I had it both for lunch.
YUM!
(Payback time will come later when I have to walk twice as long to work it off.)
Friday, July 24, 2009
NINE WORDS WOMEN USE
(1) Fine: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.
(How come my kids use this on me ?!!?)
(2) Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.
(3) Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.
(4) Go Ahead: This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It!
(5) Loud Sigh: This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to # 3 for the meaning of nothing.)
(6) That's Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. That's okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.
(7) Thanks: A woman is thanking you, do not question, or faint. Just say you're welcome. (I want to add in a clause here - This is true, unless she says 'Thanks a lot' - that is PURE sarcasm and she is not thanking you at all. DO NOT say 'you're welcome.' That will bring on a 'whatever').
(8) Whatever: Is a woman's way of saying F--YOU!
(Woah! MY kids use this on me too!!)
(9) Don't worry about it, I'll do it: Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself.. This will later result in a man asking "What's wrong?" For the woman's response refer to # 3.
So men, now you know the meaning of these words - please know when to keep really quiet so that a storm will not ensue. This should also help you to know when you need to make a visit to the *Bling* supplier to get back into her good books.
And Ladies - we now know what we really mean. Heh! Heh! *wink*
(How come my kids use this on me ?!!?)
(2) Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.
(3) Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.
(4) Go Ahead: This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It!
(5) Loud Sigh: This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to # 3 for the meaning of nothing.)
(6) That's Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. That's okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.
(7) Thanks: A woman is thanking you, do not question, or faint. Just say you're welcome. (I want to add in a clause here - This is true, unless she says 'Thanks a lot' - that is PURE sarcasm and she is not thanking you at all. DO NOT say 'you're welcome.' That will bring on a 'whatever').
(8) Whatever: Is a woman's way of saying F--YOU!
(Woah! MY kids use this on me too!!)
(9) Don't worry about it, I'll do it: Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself.. This will later result in a man asking "What's wrong?" For the woman's response refer to # 3.
So men, now you know the meaning of these words - please know when to keep really quiet so that a storm will not ensue. This should also help you to know when you need to make a visit to the *Bling* supplier to get back into her good books.
And Ladies - we now know what we really mean. Heh! Heh! *wink*
Wednesday, July 22, 2009
Entertaining at home
I love to entertain guests at home. I dont have to worry about getting someone to watch the kids, and being on "home-ground" has it advantages.
But I am one of those "worriers". Every time before the event, I will worry endlessly about any and every thing:
- aiyo!! the place is so messy. These guests will think that we are pigs. How come we can never seem to clear the mess!!
- will they be able to find their way to my place??
- parking - how are? Not enough space in my driveway sometimes!!
- what if the guests arrive late?? The food will be cold, and not nice!
- what if the food doesnt suit the guests??
- what if they think the food doesnt match??
- what if there is not enough food. Guess what? There will always be so much left overs as a result, and we can feed an army with the left overs.
- what if it rains?? - especially if we plan for it to be an alfresco event!!
- what if they bring ill-behaving kids and run the place over?? Or their kids may get bored. Will I have things to entertain their kids with??
Guess what? At the end of it, all that worry was usually unneccesary! Everything goes on as planned. Everything goes relatively smoothly. Even if there are hiccups - people just live with it, and we make do.
At the end of the day, it's usually the company and food that matters.
I am no Martha Stewart, so, no matter what, I still worry before the event.
But I am one of those "worriers". Every time before the event, I will worry endlessly about any and every thing:
- aiyo!! the place is so messy. These guests will think that we are pigs. How come we can never seem to clear the mess!!
- will they be able to find their way to my place??
- parking - how are? Not enough space in my driveway sometimes!!
- what if the guests arrive late?? The food will be cold, and not nice!
- what if the food doesnt suit the guests??
- what if they think the food doesnt match??
- what if there is not enough food. Guess what? There will always be so much left overs as a result, and we can feed an army with the left overs.
- what if it rains?? - especially if we plan for it to be an alfresco event!!
- what if they bring ill-behaving kids and run the place over?? Or their kids may get bored. Will I have things to entertain their kids with??
Guess what? At the end of it, all that worry was usually unneccesary! Everything goes on as planned. Everything goes relatively smoothly. Even if there are hiccups - people just live with it, and we make do.
At the end of the day, it's usually the company and food that matters.
I am no Martha Stewart, so, no matter what, I still worry before the event.
Monday, July 20, 2009
Elephant Memory
'An elephant never forgets' is a saying, so if a person has a memory like an elephant, he or she has a very good memory indeed.
Just earlier this month, a former school mate of mine found me on FB. We have not met for close to 30 years. We were from the same secondary school, but were from different classes. But were in the same class in JC.
Wont say that we were terribly close, but we were fairly good friends in JC.
After close to 30 years, she managed to track me down, and you know what? She remembered my birthday!! And when I enquired about her family, she told me that her mum still remembers me, and even where my dad used to work! And my friend even remembered my nephew's name and age!! Talk about having an elephant memory, and this elephantine memory seems to run in her family!!
Now, I feel under pressure to try and recall her birthday!! My woman's intuition tells me its coming up in August, but I am not 100% certain.
Do you have an elephant memory?? I definitely do not!!
Just earlier this month, a former school mate of mine found me on FB. We have not met for close to 30 years. We were from the same secondary school, but were from different classes. But were in the same class in JC.
Wont say that we were terribly close, but we were fairly good friends in JC.
After close to 30 years, she managed to track me down, and you know what? She remembered my birthday!! And when I enquired about her family, she told me that her mum still remembers me, and even where my dad used to work! And my friend even remembered my nephew's name and age!! Talk about having an elephant memory, and this elephantine memory seems to run in her family!!
Now, I feel under pressure to try and recall her birthday!! My woman's intuition tells me its coming up in August, but I am not 100% certain.
Do you have an elephant memory?? I definitely do not!!
Sunday, July 19, 2009
Bad hair Week
The week after you decide not to cut your hair and to let that great hairdressing discount lapse is guaranteed to be a bad hair week. Urghhhhhhhhh!!!
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