Envious? Maybe not!

What is envy?

It is as defined as:
"A feeling of discontent and resentment aroused by and in conjunction with desire for the possessions or qualities of another". Source: thefreedictionary.com

Well, I have always felt envious of my friends who are able to travel with their other friends at the drop of a hat.

My friends are all planning to get away together in the year we turn 50. I dont know why, but many ladies I know love the idea of going away with their girlfriends when they turn half a century old. I know many that have done it or will be doing it.

At a recent gathering with some ex-classmates, one of the husbands kept telling mine about how envious I was of his wife's recent shopping/eating/relaxing trip with some of her friends to the region. And she together with some others are planning another get-a-away again some time soon.

Oh yes, I did mention it to her once that I was envious of her trip. But it was just mentioned in passing and never revisited. So I was quite surprised when the hubs told me that it was mentioned a couple of times during the recent get-together.

I have already told them that I would not be able to join them for the trip. My kids are still young, and I dont think logistically I will be able to swing it at all. They in turn bugged the hubs to let me join them.

Well, the hubs did think about it, and said that I could join them if I wanted.

BUT, I really am not interested. Why? I really dont know.

Being together for a dinner or even a day is very different from being stuck together for a whole week!! Much as I know these girls for more than 30 years, BUT do I really know them?? (like I do my family?) NO!

Much as I enjoy my friends' company, I am also spooked by the many stories I have heard of people going away on vacation as friends and coming back as enemies.

And I dont think I want to vacation without my family. I think I will probably be sobbing away and missing them the minute I board the plane, even before the trip has begun ... and in the process, spoiling everyone's trip in the process.

Hubs and I have recently started going out more often without the kids. And what do we talk about when we are out? The kids!

So perhaps the feeling I feel of my friends' trips is not envy! Cant think of the word to describe it.

So,the question is: When I turn 50, dont I want to travel with my best friends? Well, yes, I do! But with only my "bestest" friend of more than 30 years - my husband. Erm, maybe we can try to do it without the kids.